Vol. 32, issue 3 of the Oklahoma City University Law Review landed on my desk today and it includes this article:  Erik M. Jensen, “Law School Attire: A Call for a Uniform Uniform Code.”  If the UUC is adopted here, I’ll be in trouble, as I’m not sure I even remember how to tie a tie.  Anyway, here is the code:

§ 1-101. Short Title

This statute shall be known and may be cited as the Uniform Uniform Code.

§ 2-101. Longer Stuff.

Faculty members at accredited law schools shall, when on law school grounds or on law school business, dress in a way that would not embarass their mothers, unless their mothers are under age fifty are are therefore likely to be immune to the possibility of embarrassment from scruffy dressing, in which case the faculty members shall dress in a way that would not embarrass my mother.

As for the article which presents the UUC:

Part I discusses why professors insist on dressing like children, and Parts II and III present the case for adult dress.  The heart of the article is Part IV, which provides a draft UUC [above].  Although the draft doesn’t explicitly mandate neckties, Part V defends the tie as an essential part of male professional attire.  Part VI, an anticipatory response to critics, discusses some conceptual difficulties in implementing and enforcing the UUC.  Finally, Part VII considers whether the UUC is simply part of a vast, right-wing conspiracy. (The answer is no.).